“When the trucker tried to salvage metal from batteries, he was overcome by D-cell fumes and threw up in the zinc.”
A husband died. A few weeks later the wife died. As she got to heaven she saw her husband. She ran up to him with tears in her eyes.
‘Darling, how I’ve missed you!’
The husband extends his arms stopping her from embracing him and says, ‘
Joke Of The Day
The doctor took his patient into the room and said, “I have some good news and some bad news.”
The patient said, “Give me the good news.”
The doctor says, “They’re going to name a disease after you.
The other day, Louise and I got into some petty argument. (I say it was petty. She would have said it was Armageddon.) As is our nature, neither of us would admit the possibility that we might be in error.
To her credit, Louise finally said, ‘Look. I’ll tell you what. I’ll admit I’m wrong if you admit I was right.’
‘Fine.’ I said.
She took a deep breath, looked me in the eye and said, ‘I’m wrong.’
I grinned and replied, ‘You’re right.’
1. The dog is not allowed in the house.
2. Okay, the dog is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms.
3. Okay, fine, the dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture.
4. The dog can get on the old furniture only.
5. Fine, the dog is allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to sleep with the humans on the bed.
6. Okay, the dog is allowed on the bed, but only by invitation.
7. The dog can sleep on the bed whenever he wants, but not under the covers.
8. The dog can sleep under the covers by invitation only!
9. The dog can sleep under the covers every night.
10. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dog.
Joke Of The Day In Hindi
बेटा -: पापा आप CA कैसे बने ??
पापा-: बेटा, उसके लिये बहूत दिमाग की ज़रूरत पड़ती हैं ओर बहुत मेहनत से पढाई करनी होती है…!!!
बेटा-: हां, जानता हूं, इसीलिये ही तो पूछ रहा हूँ
आप CA कैसे बने …???
पापा- दे थप्पड़…
मैं शादी आपकी बहन से करूँगा .।।
अकबर आज तक होश में नहीं आया
एक औरत अपने आशिक के साथ घूम रही थी
इतने में उसका पति आ गया और उसके आशिक को पीटने लगा ,
“मार साले को, अपनी बीवी को घुमाते नहीं,
दुसरो की बीवी को घुमाने ले आते है।”
इतने में आशिक को जोश आया और वो उसके पति को पीटने लगा…
“मार साले को… ना खुद घुमाने ले जाता है और ना किसी और को घुमाने देता है”!
शराबी चाहे कितना भी अनपढ क्यों न हो,
Quarter के तीन पेग ऐसे बनाता है,
जैसे किसी प्रयोगशाला का बहुत बडा Scientist हो!!
दुकानदार : मैंने आपको दुकान की एक-एक चप्पल दिखा दी, अब तो एक भी बाकी नहीं है।
महिला : वो सामने वाले डिब्बे में क्या है?
बहन, रहम कर थोड़ा,
उसमें मेरा LUNCH है
Best Joke Of The Day
The computer chose a secret code (sequence of 4 digits from 1 to 6). Your goal is to find that code. Black circles indicate the number of hits on the right spot. White circles indicate the number of hits on the wrong spot.
The products which we offer are handcrafted items made of natural materials such as finest quality wool from the Sharr Mountains, silk, cotton and lace. It is all blended with natural soap….and…creativity. Here are some beautiful and unique fashion accessories.
One day a college professor of Psychology was greeting his new college class. He stood up in front of the class and said, “Would everyone who thinks he or she is stupid please stand up?”
After a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up.
“Well, good morning. So, you actually think you’re a moron?” the professor asked.
The kid replied, “No sir, I just didn’t want to see you standing there all by yourself.”
You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching
them to walk and talk.
Then you spend the next 16 telling
them to sit down and be quiet.
The usual?” asks the waitress. “No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and salad,” says the man, “same for me,” says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress comes with the order and says, “That will be $12.62.”Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.