Chemistry Jokes

Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other.

One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m positive!”

If a bear in Yosemite and one in Alaska both fall into the water, which one dissolves faster? The one in Alaska, because it is polar.

. If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.

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Jokes On Chemistry

Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about Helium? He just couldn’t put it down.

Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia? Because it is its basic material.

What is a cation afraid of? A dogion.

If a bear in Yosemite and one in Alaska both fall into the water, which one dissolves faster? The one in Alaska, because it is polar.

. If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.

Isaac Asimov said that if you want to find a chemist, ask him/her to discuss the following words: mole, unionized. As he so eloquently put it, “If he starts talking about furry animals and organized labor, keep walking.”

It takes alkynes to make a world. (ACS Bumper Sticker)

Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates.

Why do white bears dissolve in water? Because they’re polar.

Why does formic acid neutralize all other acids? Because it’s an ant-acid! [Formic acid is the venom in red ant stings.]

Why does hamburger have less energy than steak? It’s in the ground state.

Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”

. Distilled waters run the deepest.

Every dipole has its moment.

. Free radicals have revolutionized chemistry.

. Got mole problems? Call Avogadro at 602-1023.

What kind of ghosts haunt chemistry faculties? Methylated Spirits.

. What substance has the formula HIJKLMNO? Water.

Why did the employer force his employees to walk between high-voltage plates before entering the work place? Because he didn’t want any unionized workers

Jokes On Chemistry

 

Jokes On Chemistry

Jokes On Chemistry

Jokes On Chemistry

Jokes On Chemistry


Funny Chemistry Jokes

. Boys vs Girls in Chemistry
Wanna talk about Sodium?
Na
Nitric Oxide?

NO
Oxygen Magnesium Phosphorus Iodine Sulfur or Fluorine?

OMg PISS OFF
…Potassium?

K

2. What is Coconut water?

Valentine for Chemist are like

Chemistry On Love – Nah.. Not Matched…
Chemistry in Kitchen

Boys vs Girls in Chemistry Wanna talk about Sodium? Na Nitric Oxide? NO Oxygen Magnesium Phosphorus Iodine Sulfur or Fluorine? OMg PISS OFF …Potassium? K ******************* 2. What is Coconut water? Valentine for Chemist are

Best Double Meaning Chemistry Jokes Baby, Let’s be Chemists .. And do it on table periodically 2. Hey Girl Do you love Water? that means 80% you love me..

Chemistry ki class mein Sir ne 1Ladki se poocha! What is Nitrate ? Ladki sharma kar boli: Kya sir, aap bhi na.. Kasam se ekdum direct ho jaate ho Night Rate is 5000/- sirf aap ke liye..

Wanna talk about Sodium?

Na

Nitric Oxide?

NO

Oxygen Magnesium Phosphorus Iodine Sulfur or Flourine?

OMg PISS OFF

…Potassium?

K

Funny Chemistry Jokes

Funny Chemistry Jokes

Funny Chemistry Jokes

Funny Chemistry Jokes

Funny Chemistry Jokes


Organic Chemistry Jokes

*. Where Does One Put the Dishes?

Q. Where does one put the dishes?

A. In the Zinc.

* What is the Chemical Formula for Water?

Little Johnny’s teacher asks, What is the chemical formula for water?

Little Johnny replies, HIJKLMNO,

The teacher, puzzled, asks, “What on Earth are you talking about?

Little Johnny replies, Yesterday you said it was H to O.

Sodium Fell in Love with a Bunsen Burner

A small piece of sodium which lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.

Oh Bunsen, my flame. I melt whenever I see you, the sodium pined.

It’s just a phase you’re going through”, replied the Bunsen burner.

*A Neutron Walks Into a Bar

A neutron walks into a bar, sits down and asks for a drink. Finishing, the neutron asks How much?

The bartender says, “For you, no charge.

*. Two Hydrogen Atoms Bumped into Each Other

Two hydrogen atoms bumped into each other recently.

One said: Why do you look so sad?

The other responded: I lost an electron.

Concerned, One asked Are you sure?

The other replied I’m positive.

*. Why Does Hamburger Have Lower energy than Steak?

Q: Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak?

A: Because it’s in the ground state.

*. What do You Call a Tooth in a Glass of Water?

Q. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

A. One molar solution.

*. Better Living Through Chemistry

Table of Elements:
C = carbon
Ho = holmium
Co = cobalt
La = lanthanum
Te = tellurium

CHoCoLaTe – Better living through chemistry.

*. What Did the Gambler do With his Cards?

Q. What did the gambler do with his cards?

A. He Palladium.

*. If a Bear in Yosemite, and One in Alaska Fall

Q. If a bear in Yosemite, and one in Alaska fall into water, which one would dissolve faster?

A. The bear in Alaska because it’s polar.

organic chemistry jokes

organic chemistry jokes

organic chemistry jokes

organic chemistry jokes

organic chemistry jokes